All posts filed under: mental health

How to Practice Self-Love While Dealing With Depression + Anxiety

For a long time (up until last year) I thought practicing self-love was impossible while dealing with depression and anxiety. I had no idea that you can experience both simultaneously. Practicing self-love & self-care during these rough patches are not full of frills and glamor, but are very subtle and extremely important. Showing yourself love at your lowest is what you need the most. It is imperative, actually. Dealing with mental health issues (which include more than just depression & anxiety, but may expand out to bipolar/manic-depressive disorder, schitzophrenia, etc), they do not give you a hand book on how self-love can be an integral piece of your coping mechanism(s). I figured I would share a few things that I extend love to myself. The ways that I still practice self-love whenever I go through a depressive phase or have an anxiety attack are: 1. I do not beat myself up about it. I say, over and over in my head, “Do not feel guilty about dealing with these things. There is no need to …

Advice to the People Who Have Never Experienced Mental Health Issues, But Still Want to Help

One thing I have been hearing a lot lately is “I don’t know what to do” from those who have never dealt with depression or anxiety, but knows and/or cares about someone that does. I know it is tough seeing someone you love, or at least close to you, suffering, but you have no idea what to do in the situation. As my mother tried comforting me during an episode, I could sense that she felt helpless. I can only imagine what it feels like being in that position, a mother who is unable to help her child in that moment. I also talked to a friend who had the same sentiments in regards to one of her close memebers of her family. I am going to share what can work & what currently works for me. Of course this may not work for everyone, and you have to judge case by case, but hopefully this gives you a bit more insight. Here we go. Number one for me is to show that you genuinely …

An Insight as to What it is Like to Deal With Depression

Depression is like this lying nagging voice that yells over your on still quiet voice. It creates situations up, pushes it as real, & then never gives up, repeating that fabricated story over & over. It conjures up some of the craziest & negative things, it amplifies them, & then doesn’t let you forget. I often have to say to myself, is this me speaking or is this depression speaking. Sometimes I legit feel crazy. You try to control the negative thoughts, be aware of them, moderate them, change them to positive, but then another one takes its place. Then you try to think of solutions, but then that hits another trigger that sets you back to your starting point. Start all over again until you hit another trigger. Then you’re beating yourself up for all that you didn’t, don’t, & cant do. Self-loathing at its best. But you want to stop. You want to be happy, but depression doesn’t give a damn. You want to smile & dance, but depression takes over your body & …

I Get It Mr. West: Maybe Kanye Is Not As Crazy As People Think

I’ve only caught the gist of what this man has been doing lately because I am not the one to follow the lives of celebrities. But I’m reading a few recaps of Kanye’s behavior as of late, all I can think about is how this black man is hurting and all he needs is some love, someone to talk to, and for someone to really care. Now, I am not behavioral psychologist, but from what Kanye has been doing, it seems to me like these are all signs for help. I’ve seen people say “the anniversary of the death of his mother does not excuse him from his behavior.” No, it doesn’t, but when you look at the groans scheme of things, he is a BLACK man, #1. Every time he has expressed himself or his truth, he has been criticized, attacked, shut down, or labeled the crazy and/or aggressive black man. From jump. At first everyone was all “Oh, haha there goes Kanye again” then it went to “Ok stfu, you’re doing too much, …

You Can’t be Black AND Depressed

In the black community depression doesn’t exist. Hold on. Let me explain. Black people do experience depression, of course, but we as a people pretend like we don’t, or at least we don’t acknowledge that we experience depression or do our damndest to convince other black people that they’re not experiencing it. We pretend that depression does not exist in the black community. We are told that depression is for White people (no offense to my White/Caucasian readers). & lets not even attempt to cry out for help because getting treated for depression is most definitely not something that we, as a people, do. We, as a people, make our depression worse. We cannot be Black and have depression because we have to be strong. This mindset might even predate slavery. We cannot show signs of weakness because we must keep fighting, we must keep pushing. We have to be strong for our families. We have to be strong Black women & our brothers have to be strong Black men. We must be the nurturers & …

Dear Depression, Leave Me Alone

I am sitting in a beautiful apartment all by myself. My belly is full and I feel warm. To most, I should be smiling & prancing around the hardwood floors…..but I am not. As much as I want to be enjoying this time by myself, I am vibrating so low. As a matter of fact, I have been for the past few weeks. I have been feeling overwhelmed and “over it”. It’s funny because most people think depression is this grey looking person who sits in a rundown dirty space. The truth is depression has many faces. I, like most people, do well not to let it show. We go out and smile, dance, have fun. We still glow and help people and act like we have it all together…but the moment we are alone it is like we take off the facade and we’re just there left to deal with ourselves.   This transitional period that started in October when I moved to Georgia from New York has been THE single most challenging thing …